I told my mom I interviewed Mariah Carey and she cried. “I know how much this means to you,” she said, verklempt. 

She knows Mariah saved my life. I was 10 and confused and gay when I first heard her voice. It was one of those meant-to-be moments: A friend eagerly, and thankfully, played me the cassette single of “Emotions.” That voice, all seven octaves, captivated me, changed me. Years later, when I heard the curly-haired, hand-wavey songstress singing pick-me-ups like “Hero,” “Make It Happen” and “Can’t Take That Away (Mariah’s Theme),” I was lifted beyond those signature high notes. 

In 1997, I was 15 and still confused, on the brink of self-discovery, without a role model. The parallel wasn’t lost on me – Mariah was coming into her authentic self, channeling the artist she never could be on the triumphant confessional Butterfly, a metaphorical nod to the newfound freedom she was feeling after years of professional and personal captivity. The album, which turns 20 next year, ended on a deeply intimate note with “Outside,” where she referenced the inferior feelings she harbored as a biracial child. 

As a gay adolescent internalizing the “feeling there’s no one completely the same,” as the song goes, my already-strong bond to the chart-topper, the diva, the survivor – my musical salvation, my “it gets better” – was strengthened. It was more than music. It is and has always been a palpable affinity to Mariah’s courageous and encouraging life story. 

The story of an emancipated 27-year-old woman asserting independence. The story of a broken-winged 31-year-old woman who, a decade into her illustrious career, hit rock bottom, entered rehab for “exhaustion” and more than made it through the rain – four years later, in 2005, “We Belong Together,” the second single off The Emancipation of Mimi, held the No. 1 spot on the Billboard Hot 100 for 14 weeks. For Mariah’s ever-faithful “lambs” who, too, have experienced, or are still experiencing the outside, it’s her inspirational narrative they’ve clung to with undying devotion.  

Nearly 25 years after first hearing her voice on cassette, my phone rings. It’s Mariah Carey, the sales-crushing icon with a whopping 18 No. 1 singles, the five-time Grammy winner, my childhood lifeline, our ally. As we speak, I’d be remiss not to acknowledge the roots of our connection, so I do. We also, of course, talk about Vegas, where she’s headlining The Colosseum at Caesars Palace with her hits show, Mariah #1 to Infinity, now armed with more “confidence,” she says, to go on vocal “tangents.” Naturally, her lingerie collection comes up. Furthermore, Mariah elaborates on the “unconditional love” she’s experienced from the LGBT community, which she emphasized when GLAAD recently recognized her with an Ally Award for all the lives she’s changed. An honor she received, in part, and most admirably, by changing her own.

You can’t see me right now but I’m bowing down.
Awww! I’m bowing down right back. 

I’m going to start with the GLAAD Media Awards because what a big moment for me, too, as a gay man to finally see you honored for being an ally. You acknowledged the “unconditional love” from the LGBTQ community, and it’s true: I’ve never had anything less than that for you. To be completely honest, you and your music were why I followed my dream of being a writer who one day wanted to interview you. And here we are. Anyway, Lamb 4 Life right here; not even kidding.
Oh, wow; that’s amazing! L4L! Seriously – that’s such a great thing to hear; thank you for telling me that. 

http://issuu.com/gayvegas/docs/gay_vegas_magazine_august_2016/46?e=12173140/37581984